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Deviousness `anmari has been spreading her infectious positivity throughout our community for over 6 years. Throughout this time Ana has been at the core of all things devious, passionately developing an eclectic gallery, helping organise devmeets, participating in chat events and also recently completed dedicating her time as a Community Volunteer. We are absolutely delighted to bestow the Deviousness Award for May 2013 to `anmari, congratulations! Read More
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Sta.sh
Member of Team 21 here to give you Feedback within the
First of all I have to say that it would have been nice if you shared the link to the model stock, even if it is purchased, so it is easier to give you some feedback on the work you did with her.
Without seeing the original stock I can't really tell if you did a lot of work on it and if it was a good job or if you just used her as she was.
But from what I have seen in your other works I guess you did a good work on her.
The way you did the lighting, having the brigthest spot on her head gives the viewer a good flow to follow the lines of her body.
The only thing I have to remark about this, that in my opinion the change from bright yellow light to the more blueish lighting on her body is a little to abrupt. It looks a little bit like someone placed a spotlight right above her head.
I like how you put her on this leaves, since fallen leaves are a symbol of decay which fits to the deviation title, also the deers skull.
I assume that you added the leaves on her arms and body, that's a very nice detail.
All in all a very nice and beautiful work!
Greetings, Selunia
First of all, I like how simple this appears. Honestly it would help a lot to have specific links to the stock you used in order to see what exactly was added where...I'm assuming the skull is an addition and I'd guess the background is, too, although what's really throwing me off is it looks like she's wearing a more modern skirt or slip underneath the fancier bit blowing out towards the audience. Anyway, clearly the elements are well blended together otherwise I'd know what was where. You're also well aware of the light source in this--a small spotlight on her face with some ambient light highlighting her legs.
You could improve the leg highlights a bit, they're not following the contours of her legs that accurately and I would expect a bit of a softer gradient. Try blurring them a bit more. There's also a very thin highlight on the top of her shins that's somewhat off-putting as you've clearly narrowed down the light source, so would recommend blacking those out. I'm having a similar issue with the lighting on her forehead, the highlight doesn't seem to be the right shape. While her body language does suggest defeat, I admit I'm not completely understanding how the title of the piece relates. The skull is nice, but right now it doesn't seem to be representative of anything. If it has a symbolic aspect that's related to a particular color or something it'd be nice to have that information in the comments.
Anyway, I'm quite impressed at your ability to put together elements and find that light source. Not to mention the painted elements, I'm not obviously seeing anything (except I suspect the hair) so well done there.
This is the last critique I do of your work for the
First of all I would like to congraulate you for another piece full of emotion and that again manages to tells us a story.
Now you named this piece "Killing my dreams".When I hear or read a proposition like that I am thinking at loosing hope, sadness, darkness, desolation. You managed all those feelings to surprise that in your wondefull piece.The background was chosen wisely and supports your theme very well .The feeling of desolation you can feel it in the leaves around her, on the colours of your background.
And I disagree with the previous critique:the model was well chosen .She has and expression of surrender, like she lost everything and nothing matters anymore.After all if we can't dream what else we will have?
Overall your piece has something that makes you put some question in your/mine head(of the ones that look at it).What happen?Why is she sad?And when people start asking question it means it is a good thing , you have raised interest with your piece and curiosity to see more.
What I would've done more?I would've work more on the lightning, the piece is kind of dark.Also the hair needs a bit more love.But thats just details , your piece is perfect and inspirational.Now I want to go and try make something as beautifull as this(I wish!)
Good luck on your future project which I am looking forward to see.
I noticed this nice contrast when looking at this work: the right side is darker than the left side. Not only that, but on the darker side, black, white, grey and silver are dominant. On the left side however, I see more gold, brown, and red. This gives the right side a very dark, cold atmosphere. The left side however, seems warmer, more welcoming, and more alive (even with that skull). What's also nice in this light is that the woman's eyes are aimed at the lighter, warmer side, like she is looking at the source of this warmth. I really love this contrast!
I also like how the model takes up pretty much all of the space. The work looks nicely filled this way. And even the skull can't take my attention away from the woman for long, probably because they are so close together. Nice job on the composition.
An idea I had when looking at this is that you could have put a few holes in her tights (I'm not sure of the word). I mean, she even lost her shoes, and especially with the title you used, I think disheveling her a little on the right side of the work would have made a bit more impact. But this may be thanks to my contrast-explanation above
There's one thing that bothers me a little and that is her face. Don't get me wrong, I don't mean to say she's ugly or something, quite the opposite, but it's her expression that's a bit dull in my opinion. I think a bit more expression would have made a bigger impact. I realise that this may be difficult, considering you used a purchased model, but I still thought I'd mention it.
Overall, I have to say that you did a fine job on this. It has a great atmosphere and composition, and also a great use of colour. Keeping my suggestions in mind, I'd say keep up the good work
Oh I love this piece so much. I don't know how I managed to miss your art before this week, because you definately have me hooked here hey!!
With this particular piece the only thing I would maybe change is the lighting, I would bring just a little bit more highlights in, as it is a bit too dark and hard on the eye at the moment. I think just a few subtle highlights will soften it a bit and make it easier to view.
Also the black line/cut out part at the bottom, I don't know what that is meant to be, but at first that gave me the illusion that she was lying on a bed. Had to look close to realize shes lying on leaves.
But over all I give you 4 out of 5 stars!!
Please note that all the opinions expressed in this comment is my own, there for take from it what you want and leave the rest behind. I do hope that it was somewhat usefull!!
Regards
Leana